Yesterday, My girlfriend, Jackie and I donned fishnets, black mini-skirts, covered ourselves in "Junk in the Trunk" bumperstickers and headed down to join the Denver Pride Parade.
Our mission? BAGGAGE PRIDE, baby!
Meaning: To sell more than a few tickets to the show.
In 95 degree weather we pounded the streets of Denver handing out fliers (ok, so we bribed the crowd to take them by offering free spray downs with water).
We worked the crowd. We joined in the fun. We had photos taken with fabulous boys in sequins. And covered ourselves in stickers and ribbons.
Overall, I gauged the event a success when a woman rode by on a uni-cycle, her top covered only by one of my bumper stickers.
Su-weet.
Then, we took station on a street corner and got down to the real business at hand. Giving out 2 for 1 tickets to the show after the parade was over.
People were hot. People were tired. Their hands were FULL of fliers.
And I was out of water in the spray bottles.
Eep.
There are over 300,000 people here today! This is a once-in-a-lifetime marketing opportunity. They are drunk. They are happy. I must give out every last flier...sell every last ticket.
Oh NO!
Suddenly, it hit me. The key to PRIDE is to have no pride. Relinquish all inhibitions. Throw these and all other silly fears into the sea of confetti.
I stuck a wad of tickets between my non-existent breasts and yelled out as loud as I could over the crowd...
"2 for 1 Theatre tickets and 6 free pairs between my breasts!!!"
And they came running.
We got mobbed.
Whether or not they will actually see the show?
I don't know.
But, I celebrated the day...
By being proud of me.
2 comments:
I am SO proud of you. :-)
this is hilarious! Nice tactics (no, that's not a eupemism!).
Looking forward to the show tonight - Cat's bringing me. I helped her tack up flyers around town so now I finally get to see the show! yay!
Post a Comment